First of all, yes. Darby IS my real name.

 I’ve been on the radio since the 1930’s and will/am STILL be on the radio well into the 3000’s made possible by a time machine I created (or WILL create depending on when you’re reading this) utilizing various wormholes and cracks in the time space continuum. I also use the time machine for sports betting/lottery ticket purchasing.

That may not be true.

I’m a big proponent of bicycling whenever possible based mainly on the super cool helmets and skin tight (sometimes sequined) aqua unitards I get to wear when pedaling. I also have a bell.

I dig all types of music and have a soft spot in my heart for The Black Crowes, virtually anything Mike Patton does, The Rolling Stones, Nine Inch Nails, folky music recorded in Wisconsin cabins and Scandinavian Melodic Death Metal.

I may have also embedded the secret entrance to my time machine somewhere in this bio. I can’t believe you can’t see it!